Todays Gaming News

Yuka · Post by **Yuka** » Wed Jun 22, 2005 4:16 pm

Hello, good evening, and welcome to the 5 o'clock news. In association with Poons.

BONG!

Our top stories.

Exciting new poll reveals parents don't care about age ratings

BONG

A battle of the handbags has broken out.

“[The PS3] is a box made of future technology as opposed to the Xbox 1.5, which seems to be a combination of things that are available today.”
Kazuo Hirai, Head of Sony’s US Games Unit

“Tech-demos are fun, but you’ve got to move on. People don’t buy tech-demos.”
J Allard, Microsoft Corporate VP

“They don’t have a chip yet so what they’re giving you is what they think they’ll get. We have chips, as the people playing the games downstairs will testify.”
Peter Moore, Xbox CVP Worldwide Marketing & Publishing

BONG!

Amazon Review the new consoles.
Revolution
PS3
360

BONG!

New Miyamoto interview.
Summary

Kohler: So, Mario 128. Where the fuck is he?
Miyamoto: We're, uh, still running tests.
Kohler: So you're telling me nothing actually exists and you're just jerking us around.
Miyamoto: Basically.

In other news.

* Earth: Said to be round, not flat
* Fire: The new invention that has everyone talking
* Kitties: Aren't they just fluffy wuffy cute?
* Chavs: Shit aren't they?

Update's as they come in.

This is Yuka. Good day to you one and all.

Discuss.

Damien · Post by **Damien** » Thu Jun 23, 2005 11:43 pm

BONG!

Chavs are de-lightful

WaWard · Post by **WaWard** » Fri Jun 24, 2005 2:27 am

Hey, that's yesterday's gaming news!

TheDarkOne · Post by **TheDarkOne** » Fri Jun 24, 2005 7:18 am

Yesterday.... from the FUTURE!

Yuka · Post by **Yuka** » Fri Jun 24, 2005 6:16 pm

Well it was new when I posted it. You just happened to be late in reading it Ward.

Do not go blaming me if you are slow.

[Edited by some Grammar Nazi

]

Lord Golbez · Post by **Lord Golbez** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 2:17 pm

yuka wrote:Well it was new when I posted it. You just happened to be late in reading it Ward.

Don't go blaming me if your slow.

Please do not use a possessive form in the place of a contraction. I think I should eliminate contractions to avoid this frequent abuse of the English language.

Yuka · Post by **Yuka** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 3:21 pm

Grammar Nazi

Entr0pi3 · Post by **Entr0pi3** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 3:36 pm

But Lord Golbez is not a mod. I wonder who might have edited your post

Yuka · Post by **Yuka** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 3:41 pm

My post was directed at whoever edited it

Calbrena · Post by **Calbrena** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 9:44 pm

I think I know who did it

TBB people are all nazis...

Anyway, thanks for the news

Yuka · Post by **Yuka** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 10:48 pm

Yay! Some appreciation at long last. You people should take after Cal.

Damien · Post by **Damien** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 10:54 pm

You shoulod write SG news updates

Also, come down and play Drag-on Dragoon 2 with us

Calbrena · Post by **Calbrena** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 11:11 pm

Damien wrote:You shoulod write SG news updates

Yuka · Post by **Yuka** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 11:31 pm

You think this is good? You should see my game reviews.

Edit: Well that was a lie. The last game review I did was Tekken 4, which went like this.

'Its faster than Tekken 3 and therefore more fun.
9/10'

Jeff 2G6 · Post by **Jeff 2G6** » Sun Jun 26, 2005 12:35 am

Anyone who rates Tekken 4 higher than 3 needs a reality check.

Damien · Post by **Damien** » Sun Jun 26, 2005 12:35 am

You certainly need to get with us for our next SG review then

http://www.squaregamer.com/forum/portal.php?article=0

Yuka · Post by **Yuka** » Sun Jun 26, 2005 1:17 pm

I dunno. I do *unusual* reviews.
I did a really good one once of Mario kart in the style of a musical.

Wonder where it went.

Damien · Post by **Damien** » Sun Jun 26, 2005 1:19 pm

How do you do a review of Mario Kart in the style of a musical? Did you dance and sing it?

Yuka · Post by **Yuka** » Sun Jun 26, 2005 1:44 pm

No. I just did a rhyming review. With Fred Savage and everything.

Damien · Post by **Damien** » Sun Jun 26, 2005 2:14 pm

How many G's did you give it?

Yuka · Post by **Yuka** » Sun Jun 26, 2005 3:00 pm

The conclusion was

'Its not the Snes game
But it'll dooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo'

Funnily enough, thats all I can remember from the review.

Damien · Post by **Damien** » Sun Jun 26, 2005 3:04 pm

I played MK64 the other week.
It's dated badly

Yuka · Post by **Yuka** » Sun Jun 26, 2005 6:48 pm

Sure has. I played FFVII the other day. Unbelievable.

Damien · Post by **Damien** » Sun Jun 26, 2005 7:44 pm

All games should be made in 2D unless the developer can be sure the graphics won't look like shit in 5 years

fire2ash · Post by **fire2ash** » Sat Jul 02, 2005 6:18 pm

I want a new street fighter, like third strike. Yay.

Entr0pi3 · Post by **Entr0pi3** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 2:33 pm

Damien wrote:All games should be made in 2D unless the developer can be sure the graphics won't look like shit in 5 years

And all games should be in 2D unless adding a 3rd dimension improves the gameplay.

Calbrena · Post by **Calbrena** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 3:03 pm

WaWard · Post by **WaWard** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 3:52 pm

I like 2d as much as anyone here, but i gotta

Questionmarktarius · Post by **Questionmarktarius** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 10:22 pm

yuka wrote:Sure has. I played FFVII the other day. Unbelievable.

I'm fairly certain we knew how bad FF7 looked even then. I remember several comments concerning the legomen 'field models', especially after the first FF8 screens started to surface.

Yuka · Post by **Yuka** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 10:31 pm

Well, FFVII was my first Playstation game after saying goodbye to my Mega Drive.

It was the best thing that I'd ever seen.

Then I bought Tekken and FF8, and that kinda ruined it.

But it WAS amazing at one point. Gameplay still is.

Questionmarktarius · Post by **Questionmarktarius** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 10:50 pm

Yeah. The rendered backgrounds, battle models, and most of the FMVs are still pretty good.

It's mostly just those godawfull blocky 'field' models that look horrifically dated, and end up sucking the rest of the game down with them.

Yuka · Post by **Yuka** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 11:17 pm

Yeah. I blame the fact that they moved to PlayStation while still experimenting with the N64.

The game seems to be built with half a PS engine and half an N64 engine.

I saw some tech videos. Looked very dodgy on N64.

But thats where the field models came from I think. They just ported them onto some fancy backgrounds.

Correct me if I'm wrong here, its been ages since I knew this stuff.

Questionmarktarius · Post by **Questionmarktarius** » Tue Jul 05, 2005 12:24 am

It seemed to me like they were making shit up for awhile, and just forgot to clean up the earlier stuff before shipping the final product.

Renge Ishyo · Post by **Renge Ishyo** » Tue Jul 05, 2005 6:37 am

“They don’t have a chip yet so what they’re giving you is what they think they’ll get. We have chips, as the people playing the games downstairs will testify.”

Peter Moore, Xbox CVP Worldwide Marketing & Publishing

?

...

Slashley · Post by **Slashley** » Tue Jul 05, 2005 7:15 am

yuka wrote:-- Then I bought Tekken and FF8, and that kinda ruined it.

Tekken 1?

That game looked so horrible

Jack was nothing but arms and a head

And even though FF8 looked better than FF7, Tifa still had bigger frontal advantages than all of FF8s cast put together. Thus FF7 was actually nicer to look at.

Jeff 2G6 · Post by **Jeff 2G6** » Tue Jul 05, 2005 8:19 am

If you think FF7 iis nicer to look at than 8 for any reason whatsoever, you must be drunk, high, or just recieved a concussion. 7 looked horrible. It does now, and it did back then.

Damien · Post by **Damien** » Tue Jul 05, 2005 12:59 pm

Entr0pi3 wrote:
Damien wrote:All games should be made in 2D unless the developer can be sure the graphics won't look like shit in 5 years
And all games should be in 2D unless adding a 3rd dimension improves the gameplay.

Like Katamari

Calbrena · Post by **Calbrena** » Tue Jul 05, 2005 2:38 pm

Renge Ishyo wrote:
“They don’t have a chip yet so what they’re giving you is what they think they’ll get. We have chips, as the people playing the games downstairs will testify.”

Peter Moore, Xbox CVP Worldwide Marketing & Publishing
?

...

Those are crisps, not chips

Like Katamari

And FF7 didn't look THAT bad back then....

Remember it was released like, just a couple of years after games like Tekken, which looked much much worse....

But yeah, FF7 does look horrible now

Renge Ishyo · Post by **Renge Ishyo** » Tue Jul 05, 2005 9:03 pm

Those are crisps, not chips

...

?

Lord Golbez · Post by **Lord Golbez** » Tue Jul 05, 2005 9:07 pm

Calbrena wrote: Those are crisps, not chips

Admit it, this is just one of the rare instances in which American English is more sensible than proper English.

Damien · Post by **Damien** » Wed Jul 06, 2005 6:09 pm

No, it isn't. Chips is already taken.

WaWard · Post by **WaWard** » Thu Oct 26, 2017 12:19 am

Yuka wrote:Hello, good evening, and welcome to the 5 o'clock news. In association with Poons.

BONG!

Our top stories.

Exciting new poll reveals parents don't care about age ratings

BONG

A battle of the handbags has broken out.

“[The PS3] is a box made of future technology as opposed to the Xbox 1.5, which seems to be a combination of things that are available today.”
Kazuo Hirai, Head of Sony’s US Games Unit

“Tech-demos are fun, but you’ve got to move on. People don’t buy tech-demos.”
J Allard, Microsoft Corporate VP

“They don’t have a chip yet so what they’re giving you is what they think they’ll get. We have chips, as the people playing the games downstairs will testify.”
Peter Moore, Xbox CVP Worldwide Marketing & Publishing

BONG!

Amazon Review the new consoles.
Revolution
PS3
360

BONG!

New Miyamoto interview.
Summary
Kohler: So, Mario 128. Where the fuck is he?
Miyamoto: We're, uh, still running tests.
Kohler: So you're telling me nothing actually exists and you're just jerking us around.
Miyamoto: Basically.
In other news.

* Earth: Said to be round, not flat
* Fire: The new invention that has everyone talking
* Kitties: Aren't they just fluffy wuffy cute?
* Chavs: Shit aren't they?

Update's as they come in.

This is Yuka. Good day to you one and all.

Discuss.

It's fucking whack that these amazon links still work.
props to amazon. your slave driving is paying off.

Lord Golbez · Post by **Lord Golbez** » Thu Oct 26, 2017 12:54 am

Are you checking all the old thread links or somethng?

WaWard · Post by **WaWard** » Thu Oct 26, 2017 11:02 am

Next level thread digging

Damien · Post by **Damien** » Thu Oct 26, 2017 5:38 pm

I forgot Wii was codenamed Revolution. That was a better name. How the hell are Amazon trying to charge £255 for one though?

Square Gamer

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