Final Fantasy VII Poetry Competition Results!

Thanks for all the great entries into our competition to win a Limited Edition Final Fantasy VII Advent Children DVD.
After much deliberation among the judging panel, we've come to a decision:

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Winner

Kat - Collection of Haikus

Pretty goth whinger
But no Lucrecia for him
Spends nights shagging Cid

Darn loser SOLDIER
Still manages big ass sword
Might drool on himself

Crotchety old pilot
Just wants you to drink your tea
&^%$ *&"£ & ^%~ #?£$

Likes guys in wheelchairs
Can't fail to notice Boobies
Excellent bitch fight

Badass hippie shit
Too obsessed with little girl
No second date, Cloud? :<

Stupid little bitch
Stole my damn Materia
Wish I could kill her

The one odd puppy
Why was his Grandpa human?
Would make a nice rug

No balls Shinra plonk
Becomes useless stuffed bastard
Your limit breaks sucked (but not as bad as Vincents... >.>)

~~Tidus~~Aeris dies. Noes spoiler!
After maxing limits too ¬_¬
Revive cheat? You nub

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Runner-Up

Renge Ishyo - An ode to FFVII characters

Cloud was a queer, he wore a dress
Cid was an engineer, whose face was a mess
Aerith was sweet, but only for disc one
Tifa had breasts, that were second to none
Red XIII was ok, for a talking dog
Cait Sith was a joke, as a robot Mog
Yuffie stole my materia, that fucking cunt bitch
Vicent looked cool, but his guns were a niche
Barret was racist, he spoke in ebonics
while Square USA translated, using "hooked on phonics"
This poem is the best, no need to think it through
just give me the DVD, before I beat you

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Kat wins the Advent Children DVD and Renge Ishyo get's Jaffa Cakes and a Limited Edition Crazy Frog Album.
Again, thanks for all the fantastic entries!
We'll be running another big-prize competition soon so keep your eyes on Squaregamer!
Winners please contact Damien by PM to claim your prizes.
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Posted: Sat Oct 01, 2005 1:09 am Post subject:

I may now have to make a career as a poet! This is a lifechanging moment 8D
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Posted: Sat Oct 01, 2005 1:51 am Post subject:

From the results, I can conclude that EVERYONE on the judging panel hated Yuffie just as much as we did Check!

I'll PM when I figure out how to do it, and oh...what's a jaffa cake??

Posted: Sat Oct 01, 2005 1:56 am Post subject:

SHANANIGANSSS!!!
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Posted: Sat Oct 01, 2005 2:09 am Post subject:

I think we still need to count the dimpled chads Check!

Posted: Sat Oct 01, 2005 2:46 am Post subject:

Posted: Sat Oct 01, 2005 5:28 pm Post subject:

I could point you to YOUR recent grammar indiscretions, LG.

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Posted: Sat Oct 01, 2005 6:59 pm Post subject:

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Yuka offers you tea and biscuits teatime

Posted: Sat Oct 01, 2005 7:19 pm Post subject:

Congrats are due...hope you enjoy the DVD! Man, I shoulda entered I REALLY want that movie... Sad

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Excuse my fits of insanity...a black guy thinking the kkk is after him kind of make you sad and mad at the same time you know?

Posted: Sat Oct 01, 2005 9:52 pm Post subject:

congrats Kat and Renge, man i really wanted the dvd too...
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Live Your Day As If You’re Going To Die Tomorrow, Because One Day When It Does Happen, You Won’t Be Able To Regret Not Living Your Last Day To Your Fullest.

Posted: Mon Oct 03, 2005 5:08 am Post subject:

Thanks! Although it doesn't really feel like I won anything (second place is the first loser after all

.

Posted: Mon Oct 03, 2005 4:07 pm Post subject:

Posted: Wed Oct 05, 2005 8:48 am Post subject:

Declaration: This result is a scam.
Demand: Anynomous insists on a recount and the Supreme Court must be involved.
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Anynomous, as unforgiving as Anonymous.

Posted: Fri Oct 07, 2005 6:04 am Post subject:

Posted: Fri Oct 07, 2005 3:52 pm Post subject:

Posted: Tue Oct 11, 2005 10:07 am Post subject:

I knew people would think it was rigged when we started coming to a decision but I didn't want that to change the result and deny an entry.
As it is, Kat hasn't accepted her prize yet

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